No longer

No longer do i question who i am.
i am found securely : wholesomely
within this : without this

no longing for individuality
a oneness within the flaws

i do not see a streaming consciousness
i feel the unnamed from a definitive core
an unarmed notion of prospect

the fruit that bares the seed
the tree from which only love grows
i find all that is necessary to survive
in long strands of commonality

sunnywalk

BR8k.lin
BR8k.lin
BR8k.lin

ERI.BR8K:lin

METRO NORTH
gate
Join Hands
Finding light through thick clouds and leafless trees. . Snow melting - warm breeezes @peace and inly et joi lna
Ahimsa

epic old face book updates

Jade Hope-Able Erdalssøn

You are not only human : you are god : and the brother of all his sons and daughters. all that is / is aware.

Know for thy self . . That all around is changing and in the light that you lend the other you find yourself. Ahimsa

If i want it even for a moment and long to possess it : it will fade away : more fit for the next and full of a my love : i forget im no one when he looks at me


If you should ever track me down : i will surrender there : i am the distance you put between the moments we will be. .


See i am no king i where no crown . But but desprit time they seem over now . But still i weaken somehow C&c Ahimsa


Contentment through lack of options has never found its self fitting in my perception of peace . . Finding clarity slowly. Love boundlessly.


I want to hear a word i never have. .Oh and if there were a lord it'd be silence. when Come the days n' nights when i know thy self as one w all of the creation


Needs to cleanse further and is attempting not to run in every direction. Admiration is my only ambition. . Correct your own spelling i dont intend on it myself


BOUNDLESS LOVE IS WITHOUT EXPECTATIONS : ITIS WHOLE WITHIN ITS SELF : ITIS GIVEN ENDLESSLY WITHOUT POSITION OR JUSTIFICATION : IT IS AND WILL BE : IT HAS BEEN.



Bagels and avatar . . . painting and coffee . . . Life life life to live.
Ahimsa

Even in here

Taking myself to a place i very rarely enjoy
but i can disguise the air with head phones,
and pretend the conversations being had are wholesome

i build my own atmosphere in here, from the spoon so
slightly balance on top of the soy creamer, i push the ugly
frangrant flower to the other end of the table and suggest
to myself that this table is made of mahogany not poly-something or other

Coffee dwindling, and since the americano with extra exxxpresso is more
expensive then the normal cup-oh-joe i wont be having another,
but at least my mouth will not taste disgusting when i leave,

shamrocks hanging, from doorways, Budweiser scrawled across them,
mmm... for what, saint Patrick, and the snakes or was that Valentine,
Do not ask me i am American, and all i know is Oprah the Simpson,
and Bill fucking Clinton, and do not think for a second that i capitalized one
of those names on my own, solidly spell check all the way.

Okay so maybe you sense that i am a tad bit bitter at the moment,
and you are absolutely correct, i have been in this town for bordering on
twenty four years, and yes i have left from time to time, on little adventures,
and that is just what they were, "adventures"have to end some time.

It is in the light

when i find motion, to shadowed by the long winter dusks
to notice any other time, finding time to appreciate what is here
and now, and dreaming of the moments to be no expectantly,
taking place in head and heart, being as virtuous as i know how to be

Walking empty streets i call my own, in hick town, blasting techno, hip hop
and folk, from lunch to dinner, just to keep the silence, and the mufflers,
clouded out, for a few, moments when i am task ridden.

The air a little warmer, and the sky a little brighter, sidewalks clearing of ice
just to prep for a few last winter hell storms, when the snow hits you in
the face you dont want to see any more, just sit by the fire with tea, and warmth.

A fleeting feeling, the breeze, uhh the grass, to know that the grass, and the flowers,
and the warm sun will touch this skin, again, whether i am patient or not, spring, and summer
are coming, sooner for me then most folks, perhaps because i commonly conceive
the details still rooted in ice, and the mud paths, as a few months pasts dust.

Oh northwestern pa, how far from my heart you'll always be, but the first
and the last home you could ever need.

hHhahaha !

watching

the daylight turn to dusk
again, and again,
through a thick
winter sky.

gray and white
white and gray
for a glimpse of
the full moon in
THIS SKY

finding words to say
i have experienced this
day to daze, impossible
six months of freezing

to an end, spring
new beginning, again
and then once more
of course, i will not

find any more wholesome place
then now living in a moment
comprehending, just a little bit
of peace, a little bit.

cold hands, and fire wood,
coffee cups, scattered on the woodstove
baybees playing, around and on
all that i am, now, and here,

lost in so many moments found
when all meaning becomes
quite clear.

I can not hear a thing in this place

Sitting at perkins in awe of ( i know) where i do live.
flannel and camo, permeate, each and every single vinyl booth
some for fad some for function, i am guilty also, not sure where i fit in to this.
but i surly do, somewhere.

somewhere, somewhere, same here.
i have an insensate need to distance myself
become closer, sitting in lonely booths
intentionally.

i fill each moment with something,
seeking something, silent, i fill my self
through heavy beats, strums, lyrics
that may never mean the same thing
in another moment, outside of this one.

i in mind

i in mind quote a thousand
fallen prophets : ones born
of a mother and a father like me

un like me : so like me
less or more to hope for

its funny that i am writing this today
twenty four years ago my mother lay in pain
as i did with my two... and never really
expect to have anything to give

i have myself : im assured thats enough
and then turned into a joke by someone
of a "higher authority

theres nothing i would search for out of
this, wanting to know thy self, to let go
to have what is had by every being, within this

i am alive, and i tell you i want to do something
i want to do something, anything, maybe nothing
but god dammit, right?! what are we to do

i need a hallow place to call my own
somewhere : where its standing that
the breath is more then honed

my stature beat less
my wholesome
speechless

i rock because i can
and i quote because
i don't intend on speaking
any truths today

ih

a mountain as it sits and pours
on to the earth remains unknowing of its height

the man seeks, drills, beats, climbs, masters
never knowing of his own incapability
to remain at rest while awake

I have not a second

I have not a second to ponder the past
nor the future

I am stuck 
but not in a descriptively painful sense 
But i am none the less stuck
within every waking moment

taught to dread
fallen to appreciate

The breath of every day becomes
becomes what it is meant to be

Hopelessly Hopeful
Like always 

In storming

Let the cool air down the turbulence reflected in the sound
the peace within only promised after the fury fades
and blesses new air with positive charge,
pulled from the in of out negative consistently fleeting

Temperance

In torrent : divest
found more stable.

less likely to end up in the
same footing, that pushed
me here, me willing
to follow : to fall

clear, not so
debased : default
basic and rampant

feet bare as always
clocked and cloaked
time and tempo

faced in awe of
broken in laws from
the beast that can not
fall : the all believer
walks in the shadows of the
defined though the defined
free from words walks
does not justify the step

virtue

virtue

virtue

About : to be: me

I feed anyone that needs feed, i let people stay here if need be, i dont put up with shit,i do not believe in "god", but feel a presence that is all inclusive and gives me the power to endlessly love, i could just be crazy but id like to think that im on a path in the correct direction, which may just be and implosive or explosive peace that i occationaly feel, the silence that only takes three breaths to achieve is much appreciated and im glad that i no longer am constantly condemning myself, i am single and have two beautiful primarily vegan children ultra intelligent my daughter is 4 and my son is 2 , i plan on doing anything i can to make sure their clarity their health (a state of wellbeing mind and body) is not in anyway sacrificed by me nor anyone else, im trying but have obviously never done this before. I will hopefully successfully continue raising them and move on to what i believe to be the ultimate exsistance, the life of travel and survival out in the world full of strangers and primarily alone, seeking truth and health and that which is in awe of my beliefs if any on that made sense PEACE! and love.